For starts, if I had to summarize four years worth of mingling with the yocals in Wyoming into a brief statement, actually I doubt I’ll ever HAVE to do that but I’m gonna do it anyways:
I HOPE YOU LIKE MAGGOTS AND LEECHES BECAUSE YOURE GOING TO BE SURROUNDED BY THEM.
Yes, I’m sure there are some decent folks here but no, that honestly is a dishonest assumption. I miss Sunny Slope. I mean yeah, a bomb went off three doors down in our apartment building there and yeah, the building”s laundry mat was locked up tighter than a mormon girls butthole the entire year I lived there because people were getting murdered in it and yeah, the city’s biological research center was stitching together Frankenstein bodies from organ donar body parts but I’d rather be there than fucking Fremont County Wyoming.
Wyoming has got this hard on for tourist dollars and they push its many natural wonders and sights but, and this is very important to remember, they also got a hard on for killing folks or Shanghai-ing them for reasons and to destinations either unknown or best left unspoken of. And it’s not a subtle favorite pastime, no…
In Riverton there are fires and stabbings and shootings and domestic violence running free as a song and nobody beats an eye lid. But and completely unassociated to the good times the town has a an air raid siren that goes off. Some times it goes eight, nine, ten times in a day. Sometimes it stays silent for weeks. And after four years I still dont know what the fuck it signals but I know it ain’t fires. I’ve even asked folks in the know about it and they brush it off claiming it’s a fire warning but I’ve personally witness four separate structures burning for hours with fire trucks and police cruisers parked along side enjoying the show and toasting winnies over the flames and there’s never been a town air raid aleet for any of them.
If I had to guess and unfortunately that’s exactly what I have to do then my guess is that air raid siren signals the Plumbers Unit to go out and remove targeted turds from the community…I’d also presume and rightly so that’s why despite every app on every SMART device I own tracks every move I make 24 hours a day but my browsers, Chrome, Opera, Mozilla Firefox as well as Google Maps cant remember from one minute to the next that I dont live nor am I in Colorado… and those fucking browsers are constantly harassing me to update my location which I do. Seriously, my fucking calculator app is authorized to use motion sensors and I cant switch that function off in the app settings. I swear under penalty of death to the truth of this fact.
Recently moved to wyoming and signed a lease agreement that the proprietors have breached because they want what’s yours? So fucking what, as long as your friends with Sherrif’s Deputy Doo-Dah or his sister, the County Court Clerk well then fuck that outsider. The state’s motto in an honest slogan would read, “WHAT’S YOURS IS MINE AND WHAT’S MINE IS MINE.”
It’s the only place I’ve ever been where instead of being friendly to your face while inwardly viewing you with contempt as you spend your money at their overpriced businesses they treat you like shit and blatantly view you with contempt as you spend your money at their overpriced businesses, its fucking crazy and I hate it.